There is a song, by a band known as VnV nation. The lyrics go
Ronan Harris writes:
When the Sun burns out will any of this matter.
Who will be there to remember who we were?
Who will be there to know that any of this had meaning for us?
And that terrifies me. The thought that for the grand majority of the projected life span of the universe nothing will care, or remember, all this struggle, passion, desire and joy. I want the works of Shakespeare to be a permanent landmark in the universe - a never fading testament to our achievements.
So does the idea of there being a God terrify me more? Probably not. A tyrannical God could probably scare me, but at least there was some point, even if it is arbitrary and unnecessarily painful.
On balance, I'd rather there was a God. I'm also painfully aware that the universe is under no obligation to grant my desires. As such, I'll just enjoy what I have and treat it as an unusual, basically surreal, privelaged experience and treat living as the unique and wonderful opportunity I feel it is.
In a way, my desire for permanence has been found. If the universe just IS and time is but a dimension then Shakespeare is, and 'always' 'will be' an entity in the universe, so will and my loved ones. It isn't just the expanse of space that is wonderful, it is the entirety of space-time that is wonderful, and it often moves me to tears to think that I'm a part of it.