An American from England in Texas

So I haven't been back to Texas in four years, and haven't lived in Texas in 7 years...Enjoy now some observations from a crotchety old atheist upon this return visit to the motherland:

• The main street in Joshua, Tx is an interesting drive - gun shop, church, grocery store, gun shop, church, grocery store, gun shop, church, etc. Eventually the grocery stores disappear but there's seems no end to the churches and gun shops.
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• The banners on the Churches were entertaining, my favourite being "Welcome to the land that God has blessed!".
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• My daughter's boyfriend is as country as they come, and one of the intensely country-western "songs" (in quotes because I question the use of the word "song" with reference to something that consisted of two alternating chords over and over) that was playing at their house included the lyrics "we are the chosen ones".
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• A friend who enjoys talking in depth about evolution and cosmology, and who has not professed any sort of religious inclination in the past, nonetheless has a copy of the Holy Bible in a prominent position on his living room bookshelf.
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• I managed to upset my mother (a Christian woman) within 24 hours of arriving by apparently saying something that belittled believers. She got over it pretty quick, and the conversation has steered away from this area since then.
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• I was very pleased to find that the science channel on DirecTV (I think that's what it was anyway) was chock full of good stuff, mostly narrated by British people hehe. I was simultaneously disturbed by the volume of Christian broadcasts available around the clock.
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• At least one family member has miserably failed the Glenn Beck test (an attempt to find out on what ground anyone would find said right-wing retard entertaining) by commenting "I like that guy, he's funny". Sigh. Sadly, I also noticed that Mr Beck's programme was available for all your brainwashing needs on what appeared to be a nightly basis.
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• Taco Bell and Taco Bueno are tasty and I miss them dearly.
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• Nobody I've talked to has heard of Richard Dawkins This profoundly upsets me.

Disclaimer: It's great to see family again, and I have nothing but love for them and for The Great State of Texas. The observations above are not meant to be disrespectful in any way, apart from the ones that are disrespectful.

Heh! Beautiful Joshua, TX, in Barnett Shale country. My company was very busy around there until natural gas prices went down.I need to find a breathing human here in Snyder who would like to discuss science at all - killin' deer and football is what we get. And I've lived here for 14 years now...

Sounds like Wisconsin. Strangely, I was born in Texas, but we moved when I was 2, so I'm missing any actual memories of it.

As a Brit I find the amount of gun shops you mention craziness of the highest order.That gun toting Texan, jar and I have had a few chat conversations in the past about the pros and cons of a gun happy state.

How long will you be staying? Texas is gigantic you should go out see some of the nice things you can only get there. The Glenrose dinosaur tracks might be a good place to start. Get yourself a nice pair of boots. Try fajitas and other Tex-Mex especially (barbacoa). Take a class on learning the "two-step". Texas is terrific, just look past the rabid bible thumpers. I'm from Dallas, I might be able to explain anything you can't figure out on your own about TX culture.

I guess I neglected to mention I was born and raised here in Texas. I've been to Glenrose several times, and one of the highlights of my childhood was visiting Carlsbad Caverns in (relatively) nearby New Mexico.I've always been a bit of a geek (or perhaps bookworm), and things like the two-step or cowboy boots interest me now as little as they always did hehe.My sister wanted to take me to Billy Bob's the other day hehe... she has two work colleagues from Manchester over for business meetings and she was going to take them "honkey tonking" lol. I've been to Billy Bob's and, although they had an undoubtedly good time, it just isn't my cup of tea.Regarding guns, even during my many years here I always had a less than approving stance towards guns. I guess my presence in a comparatively gun-free environment (England) for so long has brought into sharp relief the other extreme that is prevalent in this region. I honestly think I passed more gun shops on the way to Joshua than gas stations.Edited by Briterican, : No reason given.

I took my German wife through cowtown (Fort Worth, TX), including the stockyards and Billy Bob's, she loved it.I've missed the Texas style cuisine so much here in Germany, that I've taught myself a whole slew of the recipes from back home. With thanksgiving coming up I've got to be sure and put fried okra on the to-do list; can't wait to introduce my in-laws to something like fried okra or giblet gravy for that matter. They're already in love with buttermilk pancakes, biscuits & red eye gravy. I just have to learn how to cook chicken fried steak, at some point fer shure.

I was sent to Texas once - in connection with my job. Dallas and the surrounding area, to be precise.- I couldn't get over the temperature difference between outside and inside the mall. It was like being hit in the face going from either one to the other.- I couldn't get over the store displays: fishing rods, tennis racquets, sports shoes ...semi-automatics.- I couldn't believe the seemingly short distance between the Book Depository and the back of JFK's head. A well thrown stone could have hit it's mark on the day.- on arriving at our out-of-town destination, a visit to a local 'bar' revealed it to be the only bar for 40 miles in every direction. Apparently the county we were in was 'dry'. I wasn't a Christian at the time but the experience has been useful in that I can compare Ireland's (Catholic) Cultural Christianity with Cultural Christianity generally. The details are different - but it smells about as bad there as here.- our runabout for the trip was a Ford Escort. A tank would have been a more appropriate form of transport; the wheel on every vehicle - bar ours - appearing to exceed my own height.- the house they shot the series 'Dallas' in was tiny. On TV it looked like a ranch house. In reality it looked like a dolls house.- I saw many, many trailer parks were people actually lived (as opposed to going on holidays to). Weird.- There were lot's of Mexicans in the factory we were visiting. They did all the work, whilst the 'white' folk, who held all the trade/professional positions, didn't appear to do a whole lot. Mexicans are very nice people - was my experience from the couple of weeks we spent there.Edited by iano, : No reason given.

This is the worst. I don't have a book store near by, only a Walmart. So upon searching said chain for a copy of his latest work, all I see is Twilight and Glenn Beck's garbage, along with some Migheal Jackson literature. and other crap. Oh, and some god material (not the bible, childrens god books). I have contemplated complaining, but what good will it do? I can buy it online.

I travel a lot throughout the US, and while I've always heard Texas is how you described it, my only experience with Texas has been Austin.I gotta tell you, that's one wild and loooooossssseeeee city!None of the religious crap you would expect to find in Texas are seen in Austin. I only went out at night, so I actually didn't see any gun shops in the downtown area (or for that matter, churches). Lots of artist, musicians, street performers ... kinda reminded me of the Village in NYC.I remember thinking, this is the conservative Texas people are freaked out about? Hell, I thought LA was calmer than Austin.But I noticed a trend in Austin, which I also noticed when I was in Atlanta, GA, or any traditionally right-wing, conservative, Bible state; once the preachers go to sleep, the youth get WILD!Wilder than most other places I've hungout and drank in!Weird huh...?- Oni

A very common t-shirt and sign in Austin is "Keep Austin Weird." The rest of the state is not like there.......

I saw that when I was there! I thought it was a great motto, and very fitting. That place is weird and I love going there twice a year.- Oni

San Antonio has one that says "keep San Antonio lame"

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'Qui non intelligit, aut taceat, aut discat'
The mind is like a parachute. It only works when it is open.-FZ
The industrial revolution, flipped a bitch on evolution.-NOFX

Tell me next time you're there - I have grandkids thirty miles away so I'll have a plausible excuse to come see your show.And I'll buy you dinner at a Cuban place.

Haha! Cool, I'll definitely let you know. OK, I'm down with that. Sounds like a plan, sir!- Oni