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humor II

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subbie
Member (Idle past 1509 days)
Posts: 3509
Joined: 02-26-2006

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Message 271 of 310 (377579)
01-17-2007 3:08 PM

Hysterical and insightful at the same time.
The Quixotic Message
​
A few of my favorites:
​
IDists on ID:
​
We're not creationists, except for those of us who are, but the rest of us won't confirm that we're not. But if you call us creationists, we'll complain to no end.
​
The correct stance on issues like an ancient Earth, the common ancestry of organisms, and natural selection can be worked out later, after we've convinced the public that they should be rejecting at least one of these.
​
ID is a scientific theory for detecting purpose and teleology in nature. But don't ask us what that purpose is, because that's a religious question that's separate from ID.
​
IDists on Darwinism:
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Absolutely everything wrong in society is caused by dogmatic Darwinian atheistic materialists. Including stereotyping, demonizing, and scapegoating.
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Darwinists are responsible for both socialism and laissez-faire capitalism. Both racism and liberalism. Both feminism and sexism. Both animal research and the animal rights movement. And Commie-Nazism.
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IDists on Philosophy:
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If a living system looks well designed, it's evidence for ID. If it looks poorly designed, that's just because we have no way of knowing what constitutes good and bad design.
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Afterall, we can't tell that it's bad design because we have no way of knowing what the Designer really intends. But we do know that ID will revolutionize culture, society, and law, according to what the Designer intends.
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A good scientific theory like ID should be vague and ambiguous, and refuse to propose any specific details about mechanism or history. Some unspecified being "designed" something, somewhere, at some point in time, somehow, is a perfectly good explanation.
​
IDists on the evidence:
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The fact that the laws of the universe are perfect for life is evidence for a Designer. The fact that the laws of the universe can't produce life is evidence for a Designer.
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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin Franklin
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We see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1659 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004

RAZD Posts Only
Message 272 of 310 (380269)
01-26-2007 9:29 PM

myths and mythtakes
​
Enjoy.
​
Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)
we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.
Replies to this message:
 Message 273 by Coragyps, posted 01-26-2007 10:45 PM RAZD has not replied
Coragyps
Member (Idle past 989 days)
Posts: 5553
From: Snyder, Texas, USA
Joined: 11-12-2002

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Message 273 of 310 (380292)
01-26-2007 10:45 PM 		Reply to: Message 272 by RAZD
01-26-2007 9:29 PM

Re: myths and mythtakes
ROFLMFAO! And Heeheehee!
This message is a reply to:
 Message 272 by RAZD, posted 01-26-2007 9:29 PM RAZD has not replied
Minnemooseus
Member
Posts: 3971
From: Duluth, Minnesota, U.S. (West end of Lake Superior)
Joined: 11-11-2001
Member Rating: 7.1

Minnemooseus Posts Only
Message 274 of 310 (380381)
01-27-2007 2:09 AM

Real Life Simpsons Intro
​
Moose
Replies to this message:
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Minnemooseus
Member
Posts: 3971
From: Duluth, Minnesota, U.S. (West end of Lake Superior)
Joined: 11-11-2001
Member Rating: 7.1

Minnemooseus Posts Only
Message 275 of 310 (381453)
01-31-2007 1:25 AM 		Reply to: Message 274 by Minnemooseus
01-27-2007 2:09 AM

Not humor, but still really neat vidio
As they say - "At first glance it may look like a computer generated graphics, but it is a live presentation (20Mb)".
​
http://xpock.com/?p=867
​
I had all kinds of trouble getting it to buffer.
​
Moose
This message is a reply to:
 Message 274 by Minnemooseus, posted 01-27-2007 2:09 AM Minnemooseus has not replied
Replies to this message:
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RAZD
Member (Idle past 1659 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004

RAZD Posts Only
Message 276 of 310 (381609)
01-31-2007 9:31 PM 		Reply to: Message 275 by Minnemooseus
01-31-2007 1:25 AM

Re: Not humor, but still really neat vidio
gorgeous.
​
I put it on pause to let it load before watching, no buffer problem.
​
digital quality could be better but oh well.
​
Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)
we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 275 by Minnemooseus, posted 01-31-2007 1:25 AM Minnemooseus has not replied
riVeRraT
Member (Idle past 670 days)
Posts: 5788
From: NY USA
Joined: 05-09-2004

riVeRraT Posts Only
Message 277 of 310 (381848)
02-02-2007 9:36 AM

Robot
A man walked into a very high-tech restaurant in a fancy hotel.
​
As he waited to be seated, he noticed that the Maitre D' was a robot.
​
The robot clicked to attention and said,
"Sir, there is a one hour wait.
And I am programmed to converse with you until a table is ready, If you please."
​
Intrigued, the man said, "OK."
​
The robot clicked a couple more times and then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"
​
The man answered, "Oh, about 164."
​
The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity,
Interstellar space travel, the latest medical breakthroughs, etc.
​
The man was most impressed. The next day he returned,
But thought he would try a different tack.
​
The robot again asked, "What is your IQ, sir?"
​
This time the man answered, "Oh, about 100".
​
So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing ,
the latest basketball Scores,
and what to expect the Red Sox to do this weekend.
​
The guy had to try it one more time. So the next day he returned.
​
Again the robot asked the question, "What is your IQ?"
​
This time the man drawled out, " Uh.....'bout 50."
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The robot clicked, then leaned close and very slowly asked,
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"A-r-e
​
y-o-u-r
​
p-e-o-p-l-e
​
g-o-i-n-g
​
t-o
​
n-o-m-i-n-a-t-e
​
H-i-l-l-a-r-y?"
Replies to this message:
 Message 279 by Jon, posted 02-02-2007 11:24 AM riVeRraT has replied
 Message 281 by subbie, posted 02-02-2007 11:31 AM riVeRraT has not replied
Jon
Inactive Member

Jon Posts Only
Message 278 of 310 (381892)
02-02-2007 11:15 AM

Crossicus?
So I did a search on Dictionary.com because I wanted to know what the things are called that come out of the cross. I thought it was rather strange the first thing that came up:
​
​
J0N
Jon
Inactive Member

Jon Posts Only
Message 279 of 310 (381894)
02-02-2007 11:24 AM 		Reply to: Message 277 by riVeRraT
02-02-2007 9:36 AM

Re: Robot
Odd... educated people are more frequently democrats. It's the dumb ones that become republicans!
​
J0N
​

Not to exclude anyone from this list: Creationists, junkies, failures, drop-outs, criminals, liars, cheaters, insurance salespersons, prosecutors, and anti-emoticoners!
​
This message is a reply to:
 Message 277 by riVeRraT, posted 02-02-2007 9:36 AM riVeRraT has replied
Replies to this message:
 Message 280 by subbie, posted 02-02-2007 11:28 AM Jon has not replied
 Message 282 by riVeRraT, posted 02-02-2007 7:31 PM Jon has not replied
subbie
Member (Idle past 1509 days)
Posts: 3509
Joined: 02-26-2006

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Message 280 of 310 (381895)
02-02-2007 11:28 AM 		Reply to: Message 279 by Jon
02-02-2007 11:24 AM

Re: Robot
Perhaps the joke refers not to all dimwitcrats, but that particularly suicidal subset who wants to throw away any chance at the White House in 2008 on Hillary The Unelectable.
​
Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin Franklin
​
We see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat
This message is a reply to:
 Message 279 by Jon, posted 02-02-2007 11:24 AM Jon has not replied
subbie
Member (Idle past 1509 days)
Posts: 3509
Joined: 02-26-2006

subbie Posts Only
Message 281 of 310 (381896)
02-02-2007 11:31 AM 		Reply to: Message 277 by riVeRraT
02-02-2007 9:36 AM

Re: Robot
This time the man answered, "Oh, about 100".
​
So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing...
​
Heh, NASCAR, invented for people who don't understand the intricacies of professional wrestling.
​
Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin Franklin
​
We see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat
This message is a reply to:
 Message 277 by riVeRraT, posted 02-02-2007 9:36 AM riVeRraT has not replied
riVeRraT
Member (Idle past 670 days)
Posts: 5788
From: NY USA
Joined: 05-09-2004

riVeRraT Posts Only
Message 282 of 310 (381990)
02-02-2007 7:31 PM 		Reply to: Message 279 by Jon
02-02-2007 11:24 AM

Re: Robot
This is the joke thread, get it?
This message is a reply to:
 Message 279 by Jon, posted 02-02-2007 11:24 AM Jon has not replied
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1659 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004

RAZD Posts Only
Message 283 of 310 (382720)
02-05-2007 8:51 PM

goldilocks - modern version ...
Goldilocks, a little older but still still as impulsive as ever, was in northern canada when she saw a small house. Feeling a little cold, hungry and tired she went in to see what she could find. The usual three chairs, the usual three bowls of porridge, and then upstairs to bed ... but there is only one bed.
​
At that moment the owners return, one shouts with rage about the broken chair, one weeps for the eaten porridge and then they come upstairs. Two large male bears enter and then a small female, where they find Goldi ... the female looks and smiles "Welcome to our house, would you like to spend the night with us?" ... it is at that moment that Goldi realizes that they are bi- polar bears ...
​
Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)
we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.
Doddy
Member (Idle past 6163 days)
Posts: 563
From: Brisbane, Australia
Joined: 01-04-2007

Doddy Posts Only
Message 284 of 310 (383124)
02-06-2007 11:03 PM

Name a country starting with 'U'...
Not sure if this has been posted, but here goes:
​
Why People Believe Americans Are Stupid
​
"Der Mensch kann was er will; er kann aber nicht wollen was er will." (Man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills.) - Arthur Schopenhauer
Replies to this message:
 Message 285 by RAZD, posted 02-07-2007 7:13 AM Doddy has not replied
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RAZD
Member (Idle past 1659 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004

RAZD Posts Only
Message 285 of 310 (383154)
02-07-2007 7:13 AM 		Reply to: Message 284 by Doddy
02-06-2007 11:03 PM

Re: Name a country starting with 'U'...
they walk among us ... and vote.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 284 by Doddy, posted 02-06-2007 11:03 PM Doddy has not replied
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