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Author Topic:   Will The Real God Please Stand Up?
ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


(1)
Message 7 of 364 (378936)
01-22-2007 1:26 PM
Reply to: Message 3 by Phat
01-22-2007 11:21 AM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
I approach Jesus.
"Where are the references that show your credentials?" I laugh and walk away.
He thumps a Bible on the table.
"It's customary to ask for two pieces of ID." I add, "Photo ID."
The rest is silence.

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Replies to this message:
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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 11 of 364 (378955)
01-22-2007 2:39 PM
Reply to: Message 9 by anastasia
01-22-2007 2:02 PM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
anastasia writes:
Jesus was born way before the invention of the camera.
If He lives today, that's no excuse.
He has probably had His image drawn up more than the other 3 combined....
So has Snoopy.
Edited by Ringo, : Added signature.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 18 of 364 (379017)
01-22-2007 5:26 PM
Reply to: Message 16 by Omnivorous
01-22-2007 5:08 PM


Re: Will the rest of the world please wrath up?
Omnivorous writes:
I just want to say that there are an awful lot of Asian, American, African and Australian Gods who are very unhappy with your OP.
That's where my cross-examination is going.
First I want proof of identity from all of them. Then I want proof of omnipotence. (I'm not sure how the retro-proof of creation is going to work out.)
As we eliminate the imposters, we can roll in the next batch of contenders.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 20 of 364 (379024)
01-22-2007 5:53 PM
Reply to: Message 19 by Omnivorous
01-22-2007 5:43 PM


Re: Will the rest of the world please wrath up?
Omnivorous writes:
You could be the living acid test, Ringo.
I was thinking of shooting them one at a time to test their immortality. The omnipotent and/or fairlipotent might eat me in self-defense.
I'm mulling over whether or not to make the sacrifice in the name of TruthTM.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 22 of 364 (379029)
01-22-2007 6:14 PM
Reply to: Message 21 by Omnivorous
01-22-2007 5:58 PM


Re: Will the rest of the world please wrath up?
Omnivorous writes:
So how about you and them fight?
Remember the three-way gunfight at the end of The Good, the Bad and the Ugly? The key is in deciding Whom to shoot first.
If I shoot one of the imposters and the others all panic and zap me, will you be able to tell which one is the Real Thing? Can you tell the Real Zap from a parlour trick?
The only reliable test is if I shoot the Right One and He/She doesn't die.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 37 of 364 (379228)
01-23-2007 1:32 PM
Reply to: Message 30 by Phat
01-23-2007 5:38 AM


Re: for the record
Phat writes:
I wanted to present the evidence in John 1 as well.
Objection. John can not testify to Jesus' identity until John's own identity is established.
I submit that the darkness of human reasoning cannot fathom the light as defined by Johns author.
Objection. If John's author was human, why wouldn't his reasoning be as dark as anybody else's?
I submit that Jesus is mentioned in the top bestselling book and that the other candidates are not...
Objection: The "top bestselling book" is irrelevant. First, it is a bestseller only because its adherents are required to own a copy. Second, the other candidates are mentioned in countless books and oral traditions where Jesus is not. Third, popularity has no bearing on any of the candidates' claims.
I move that all mention of "the Bible" be stricken from the record.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 42 of 364 (379379)
01-23-2007 10:48 PM
Reply to: Message 41 by Hawkins
01-23-2007 9:29 PM


Hawkins writes:
He will write down the answer on a piece of paper before you question.
Have you ever seen my favourite movie, The Good, the Bad and the Ugly? There is no name on the paper because there is no name on the grave.
You have to dig.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 44 of 364 (379385)
01-23-2007 11:19 PM
Reply to: Message 43 by Rob
01-23-2007 10:57 PM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
Rob writes:
Law and grace... The Old and New Testaments... There is His ID.
Verifiable ID.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 46 of 364 (379389)
01-23-2007 11:38 PM
Reply to: Message 45 by Rob
01-23-2007 11:34 PM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
Rob writes:
Well, if you live to see the dead raised at the rapture as prophesied by Ezekiel, will that be enough of an earthquake to shake your foundation?
You're missing the point of the thread. The evidence has to be presented here, in the courtroom. We're not interested in sitting around waiting for the Gotterdammerung.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 49 of 364 (379394)
01-23-2007 11:48 PM
Reply to: Message 47 by Rob
01-23-2007 11:40 PM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
Rob writes:
That's why your blind!
Justice is supposed to be blind.
In this courtroom, all of the candidates are on an equal footing. They all have to offer the same level of evidence.
If you don't like that, you can go outside and preach on the street corner. This is not the place for you.

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Replies to this message:
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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 56 of 364 (379411)
01-24-2007 12:32 AM
Reply to: Message 53 by Rob
01-24-2007 12:24 AM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
Rob writes:
I wasn't talking about justice.
Well, the rest of us are - equal justice for all of the candidates for the position of "God". A level playing field.
Now, would you care to present some evidence for the candidate of your choice? Or does He need a better advocate than you?

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 58 of 364 (379416)
01-24-2007 12:43 AM
Reply to: Message 57 by Rob
01-24-2007 12:40 AM


Re: Can I tell the truth, Jesus?
Rob writes:
He only needs an audience who actually wants the truth.
We're not interested in your version of The TruthTM here. We're interested in evidence. If you don't have any, please stop interrupting these proceedings.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 92 of 364 (379813)
01-25-2007 2:48 PM
Reply to: Message 91 by Malachi-II
01-25-2007 2:26 PM


Re: I am late but I am here if you chose to have faith
Malaci-II writes:
I do not have legs on which to stand. I do not have physical features that you would recognize.
I am the temporary resident of mortal flesh
You contradict yourself.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 94 of 364 (379818)
01-25-2007 2:52 PM
Reply to: Message 83 by Archer Opteryx
01-25-2007 11:02 AM


Re: the party at the hospital
Archer Opterix writes:
The self-abusive woman had an idea for a costume that involved cutting off her head and carrying it to the party under her arm.
That would be a hell of a costume if it wasn't for the logisitc problems.
We could try that as an option to my "shoot 'em all" proposal. Cut off all their heads and see Who rises on the third day.

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ringo
Member (Idle past 527 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005


Message 119 of 364 (380107)
01-26-2007 12:08 PM
Reply to: Message 108 by Malachi-II
01-26-2007 3:34 AM


Re: I am late but I am here if you chose to have faith
Malachi-II writes:
You failed to understand the meaning of 'temporary'.
Actually, you failed to understand it. If you can temporarily poof yourself legs once, then you can temporarily do it again.

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Replies to this message:
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