It is our choice...the actor merely set the parameters.
If I put a cake baked with shards of broken glass and a juicy steak on a table and leave the choice of which to eat up to you, am I responsible if you decide to eat the broken-glass-cake and die in horrific pain? I merely set the parameters, after all.
We certainly make the
real world the way it is, at least so far as society contains its own ills (clearly we bear no responsibility for an asteroid colliding with the Earth or other such disasters).
But this isn't man's torture of man that we're talking about when we discuss hell. Hell is an artificial construct created for the
express purpose of eternal torture through
burning in unquenching fire forever fully conscious and aware. Apologetically comparing the Christian concept of hell to self-torture through deep guilt or masochism or self-destructive behavior or even torturing others from a
mortal perspective simply
doesn't come close. It's like comparing a candle flame to the Sun - they bear a resemblance only to an ignorant child.
It's not a matter of "why we cant have our cake and eat it too?" Not at all. A measured and reasonable punishment for moral failings in life would not be terribly immoral itself. If "hell" was actually more akin to an eye for an eye, experiencing all of the pain
and all of the joy that resulted from your living actions, we wouldn't be having this discussion. If "hell" was actually a place where those who behaved wickedly were helped to realize the error of their ways and atone and be forgiven and reintegrated into society in "heaven," we'd be
applauding that aspect of Christian morality.
But the "hell" concept doesn't look anything remotely like those. Even Hitler wouldn't deserve
eternal punishment. At some point, after he had been burning alive for 1000 years for each and every person who died in WWII, even the most evil horror-movie sadist would have to say "Okay, he's probably had as much as he deserves, let him go."
Of course, the hilarity of it all is that the
other aspects of Christianity allow even
Hitler to simply "believe" in something and his sins are washed away by the human sacrifice/scapegoat of Jesus.
That is having your cake and eating it too. Except the cake turns into human flesh, I suppose.
The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it. - Francis Bacon
"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers
A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity. — Albert Camus
"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." - Barash, David 1995.