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Author Topic:   Humour VI
onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 17 of 553 (603830)
02-07-2011 11:23 PM


Best Super Bowl Commercials
1)
2)
3)
4)
- Oni

Replies to this message:
 Message 18 by Taz, posted 02-08-2011 8:53 AM onifre has replied
 Message 19 by Artemis Entreri, posted 02-08-2011 9:31 AM onifre has seen this message but not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 20 of 553 (603850)
02-08-2011 9:36 AM
Reply to: Message 18 by Taz
02-08-2011 8:53 AM


Re: Best Super Bowl Commercials
Well then you make a commercial and lets see how close to perfect yours is...
- Oni

This message is a reply to:
 Message 18 by Taz, posted 02-08-2011 8:53 AM Taz has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 21 of 553 (603900)
02-08-2011 7:29 PM


Wait for it...
The greatest thing to ever happen on the Feud. Watch till the end.
27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" alt=""Name Something You Pass Around" Funny Videos">
"Name Something You Pass Around" - Watch more Funny Videos
8% of the people in the survey are awesome!
- Oni
Edited by onifre, : No reason given.

Replies to this message:
 Message 22 by bluescat48, posted 02-09-2011 1:28 AM onifre has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 27 of 553 (604429)
02-11-2011 9:21 PM


Moose struck it down in the suggestions and questions thread as off topic, but I found it hilarious. It seems more apropos in this thread.
Dr. A's poem:
For reasons you alone know why
you slander, slur and vilify
and libel and malign and lie
and thick and fast the insults fly
at those whom you demean;
in words four letters long you prate
about the people whom you hate;
you smear, traduce and denigrate
and cast aspersions and create
an ugly scene.
But if some voice of protest's heard ---
some angry or dissenting word
to tell you that you're quite absurd
or give the finger or the bird
or dare to answer back
or goad you on with words that nettle,
you hypocrite, you show your mettle
by calling on the mods to settle
just which utensil, pot or kettle,
is deeper black.
You two-faced fool, you prate and piffle
and talk a lot of silly drivel
and sob and scream and whine and sniffle
how other people should be civil
as though your posts don't stink.
You throw your childish fit of pique
and stamp your little feet and shriek,
have tantrums 'til you're hoarse and weak
and get so angry you can't speak
or even think.
You moan of what you must endure:
a terrible ordeal, I'm sure
for one so deeply immature
to get to taste the stuff that you're
so fond of dishing out.
With neither honesty nor wit
you throw your little hissy fit
and babble out your prissy shit
and prove yourself a hypocrite
beyond all doubt.
Feel free to scratch my name upon
your potty little ostracon
and tell the mods I should be gone
and see if you find anyone
who gives a tinker's damn.
You silly whining little pest,
though long and loudly you protest
I think MacMahon put it best:
"I'm here, I stay" ("j'y suis, j'y reste")
--- and here I am.
Well done, Dr. You should write a book with funny atheist poems (if you haven't already.) In fact, there are some creative people here at EvC, maybe a small book (like the Atheist bible, or a book you read in the john) with some original poems, songs, raps like Stragglers, all from atheist. Something like that. And yes, I'm baked right now, but it's still a good idea. I think?
- Oni

Replies to this message:
 Message 28 by Straggler, posted 02-12-2011 5:18 AM onifre has not replied
 Message 36 by Straggler, posted 02-19-2011 7:34 AM onifre has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 34 of 553 (605222)
02-17-2011 6:37 PM


Al Jackson tomorrow night on Comedy Central
If you're in the US and enjoy comedy, please watch my boy's Comedy Central Presents tomorrow night at 10pm(eastern) on Comedy Central.
He's my best friend, we started out together and I have lots of love for this dude. Plus high ratings helps out the ventures he and I are planning, to include help funding our Euro Tour - and I'd like to stay in nice hotels when we do this, so watch his Presents!
Jokes.com
Al Jackson - 7th Grade Reunion Tour
comedians.comedycentral.com
Watch Al Jackson host The Open Mic ChallengeWatch Al Jackson talk about MarijuanaJokes
- Oni
Edited by onifre, : No reason given.

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 46 of 553 (605914)
02-22-2011 6:52 PM


Shameless self promotion
If you're in the states, please follow this link (watch my 1-min video) and text if you can so I win this thing.
South Beach Comedy Festival
Thanks in advance,
- Oni

Replies to this message:
 Message 62 by xongsmith, posted 03-04-2011 5:30 PM onifre has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 47 of 553 (606335)
02-24-2011 9:25 PM


This is hilarious because I'm juvenile
Notice, he never answers whether he is a lizard or not...
- Oni

Replies to this message:
 Message 48 by Straggler, posted 02-26-2011 6:06 PM onifre has replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 65 of 553 (607677)
03-05-2011 10:02 PM
Reply to: Message 48 by Straggler
02-26-2011 6:06 PM


Re: This is hilarious because I'm juvenile
But more to the point - No reaction to my rhyme entirely dedicated to you earlier upthread?
Dude, just finished moving in this weekend to NY, just getting back to the forum. I looked at the lyrics, tight work as always dude. And I'm honored to be the muse for this new MC Strag slam. Plus dude, I'd love to chill in a meditation with Harris and have such a funny thing happen like his balls getting burned up. It would make for a great story on stage.
But man, did Harris have to get castrated? A bit too far,
Have I managed to offend the Oni-ister?
Never dickbag now go fuck yourself.
(Just trying to save the planet)
- Oni

This message is a reply to:
 Message 48 by Straggler, posted 02-26-2011 6:06 PM Straggler has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 66 by Straggler, posted 03-06-2011 5:17 AM onifre has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 251 of 553 (622141)
07-01-2011 1:51 AM


one giant cunt
Great scene from Lucky Louie:
- Oni

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 443 of 553 (640918)
11-14-2011 10:29 AM
Reply to: Message 440 by Omnivorous
11-12-2011 9:34 PM


Re: My First Fan Letter
Let me help, Omni:
quote:
Dear Brandon (my biggest fan),
Thank you so much for taking the time to ackowledge a vet, I assume other than writing this letter you could have be sleeping in class. So thanks again.
The country that fought the hardest is of course none of them. The Unided States has the biggest cock kid, you'd know that if you listened to enough Toby Keith.
The best thing about being a vet is, strippers really treat you nice when you let them know about your service. Trust me, the VIP room is extra VIP if you know what I mean...you prolly don't...queer.
I used to like helping the country till all the Mexicans moved in; with them, and all the blacks, I really don't know what I'm fighting for. I have no favorite country besides the Unided States, and frankly, I'm not so much enjoying this one either. If I could, I'd start my own country with ONLY Americans, like the good Lord intended.
Well take care and get back to ignoring your liberal, commie, gay-loving public school teacher, and I hope one day to call you a vet too.
PS. My favorite weapon is ALL of them. Specifically the ones designed to kill things. You'd know that if you listened to enough Toby Keith.
Oni
Edited by onifre, : No reason given.
Edited by onifre, : No reason given.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 440 by Omnivorous, posted 11-12-2011 9:34 PM Omnivorous has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 449 by Omnivorous, posted 11-14-2011 3:26 PM onifre has not replied

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 482 of 553 (642602)
11-30-2011 4:20 AM


Comedy loses another one
Known in this forum for having sparked some violent, verbal assaults between Rrhain and myself (that lingers on today) with this video:
Patrice O'neal has passed away at the age of 41.
Comedian Patrice O'Neal died Tuesday morning.
Whatever the opinions of him may have been, both here and in the outside world, he was an amazing comic with his own unique voice and views and was never apologetic for being himself. He was a bad mother fucker who will be sadly missed in the comedy world. There is no one in the game doing or saying what he said, whether you agree with it or not, it's an angle lost when he died.
At his best:
This truly sucks, sad sad day.
- Oni

onifre
Member (Idle past 3067 days)
Posts: 4854
From: Dark Side of the Moon
Joined: 02-20-2008


Message 502 of 553 (643692)
12-10-2011 12:12 PM


For Phat
Louis Ck on evolution:
The next big thing, keep an eye out for this guy, Hannibal Buress. Developing a show with Jonah Hill:
OWS's own, Ted Alexandro:
One of the best ever, Maria Bamfooooo (Bamford):
- Oni

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