Guido---dont let these guys give you any crap! None of us know each other...I certainly have profiles of others here in my mind, but I do not know them.
Guido: Angry Young Teenager writes:
humans suck and are all retarded and there is no love in the world so shall ye all burn in hell.

Here in the school of hard knocks, nobody is gonna coddle you---thats for sure! You have some unique challenges in your life as you grow up, and your intellectualism is not the main one. You are bright yet impatient, and get easily bored. Hopefully, your friends are good influences...I've known some kids who had thug friends and who got in all sorts of trouble.
God will bring some girls your way in His timing...it is natural and appropriate to get involved in the context of a group such as a youth group. It is unfortunate that your Pastor is a jerk. Don't give up looking for good mentors in life, though.
Jar, and nwr, and I are always willing to discuss issues with you concerning intellectual ideas, and you can connect a bit to the adult world at this site with a reasonable degree of rationality.
There is no substitute for one on one relationships, however. Watch yourself out there! There are weirdos lurking everywhere...but I expect that you are bright enough to discern them.
As far as sexual expression is concerned,
this link provides a worldly yet rational dissertion on the issues with teenagers.
From the Christian perspective, there are a lot of mixed messages about that stuff as well. I do not think that it is natural and OK for a teenager to experiment with his/her emotions and hormonal urges.
You are quite right in wanting to wait until marriage, if possible.
I will say that forced abstinance is also a bit extreme...you know how it is when the more you try and NOT think about something, that is soon all you think about?

Your best strategy, in my opinion, is to find a well balanced and healthy group of active kids...of both sexes...to hang out with in a controlled setting such as a cool church group (as opposed to controlling ones) or maybe a physics club or a journalism class or some sort of a group with shared activities that stimulate your mind and keep you busy.
You can grow emotionally by hanging out with a mixture of age related friends and older mentors. Im sorry that your Pastor was insensitive to you---but don't let it discourage you.
Only you know if that youth group is right for you or if you need to find a better one. Pray about it, and ask God to forgive all of the people who have hurt you in your life. You are a bright kid with a bright future! Im praying for you as well, Guido! You da spiritual pimp!

Nature is an infinite sphere of which the center is everywhere and the circumference nowhere.Pensées (1670)
We arrive at truth, not by reason only, but also by the heart.Pensées (1670)
Heb 4:12-13--
For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.Holy Spirit--speaking through the Apostle Paul