Woodmorappe Grades A Paper

A parody of recent arguments against radiometric dating, in one act.DRAMATIS PERSONAE:
Prof. WOODMORAPPE
MYSELF, cursed to recieve his tutelage
FRANK, an idiotME: I've completed the test, Professor.WOOD: Excellent. Let me grade it. (compares answers to the answer key.)
WOOD: You've recieved an almost perfect score; from this, I can conclude that you have cheated.ME: What?!WOOD: It's quite simple. That's the only way that you could have achieved such a perfect score.ME: It hasn't occured to you, I suppose, that I was able to perform so well as a result of study, or hard work?WOOD: Ah, but if that's so, how do you explain Frank's poor results? Behold; he missed almost every single question. I'm sure that you would have had much the same result, if you hadn't secretly compared your test to the answer key, even though I never saw you do this, or change any answers. Clearly, though, there must be a wastebasket somewhere in the classroom filled with your wrong answers, and if I can't ever find it, well, that only speaks to your success in hiding it. It's a wonder that I was able to even find this single example of how poorly all students do on tests.ME: Frank did as poorly as he did because he's an idiot; he spent all night partying with his frat brothers, not studying. I actually knew the material.WOOD: Ah, how convinient for you! Every time a test is concordinant with the answer key, it's because the student knew the material. Yet, every time a test is discordinant, it's easily explained away by "the student didn't know the material!" Very suspicous, wouldn't you say? I should say so!ME: You're not really a professor at all, are you?WOOD: Well, er, no. And Woodmorappe isn't even my real name. Nonetheless, I insist that you accept the failing grade I'm giving you as valid!--------------------------Ok, well, perhaps the denounment lacks something, but if it fails to be fully resolved, that's largely because it's written from life, and in life, we can never seem the get these guys to see how stupid their arguments are, too.This message has been edited by crashfrog, 12-15-2004 02:56 PM

That's a parody? Sounds more like the norm.

---

Aslan is not a Tame Lion

lol pretty good.