Zombie Purists

I'm disturbed by a new trend in zombie movies - speedy zombies. What's up with that? The undead are supposed to be shambling, brainless husks animated by eldritch powers or weird science. Their necrotic muscles and rotting inner ears simply aren't capable of the bursts of catlike speed in movies such as "28 days" (not technically undead, I suppose) and the upcoming "Dawn of the Dead" remake.This lack of realism in the new crop of zombie movies concerns me. Anyone care to share their thoughts or their favorite zombie moments?

While I will agree with you on asthetic grounds, seems kinda like stereotyping the undead. "There dead, they can't move fast."
Seriously, I think the undead should start a campaign. Just because they are dead doesnt mean they don't have feelings. I mean, they occasional feast on living flesh by the dead shouldn't be grounds for targeting them visiously. Heck, maybe in the old days, they couldn't get a good union, so when the director said " Ok you zombies, wade in real slow." and the zombies protested, he would shoot back, " Hey, there aren't alot of jobs in tinsel town for teh smelly likes of you. You'll do what your told. I don't care if you can windsprint faster than me, when I say shamble, YOU SHAMBLE."
Now that we live in a more enlightened age, the undead aren't facing such discremnation, and a few just whant to shatter some old stereotypes. IS THAT SO WRONG!ps. wow, I need some sleep.

What about Al Gore vs. Howard Dean?Moose

Me and a friend considered starting the "Zombie and Nazi Anti-defamation League" in response to the negative portrayal of zombies, Nazis, and zombie Nazis in cinema and video games. But we abandoned the idea after considering the meetings:"Zis meetink vill come to order. Herr secretary Urrg vill read ze minutes.""Urg"."Zank you, Herr Urrg. I vould like to sank ze zombies for bringink ze refreshments tonight, but I vould like to remind zem once again zat brains are strictly verboten!"That and nobody likes zombies, Nazis, or zombie Nazis, and we didn't want to be associated with those damned, dirty undead.That said, I just don't think that zombies can run that fast. A) A zombie certainly wouldn't be any more agile in undeath than it was in life and B) Rigor mortis affects zombies. I don't think it's stereotyping. I think it's just biological reality.[This message has been edited by crashfrog, 03-20-2004]

Al Gore vs. John Kerry. Now that's a zombie showdown. They even put the audience into the trance of undeath.

I agree with your concern about the speedy undead.While I totally forgive 28 days because it was not undead, just really hyped up living people, the Dawn of the Dead remake has me scratching my head (other than the obvious question of why remake a classic).

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That said, I just don't think that zombies can run that fast. A) A zombie certainly wouldn't be any more agile in undeath than it was in life and B) Rigor mortis affects zombies.

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I'll start with B because I totally agree with that. Not only should there be rigor mortis, but there should be decayed muscles and tendons (meaning weakness as well as stiffness).Until yesterday I would have agreed with A as well. In a News of the Weird article, it said that scientists had discovered that cockroaches, like humans, get stiff and slow as they grow older. Some of them wondered how much was do to a slowdown in brain processes rather than body processes. So they chopped off the heads of slow, old cockroaches (essentially making them undead) and the cockroaches became speedy and agile again (thought obviously without sight).So maybe A isn't true. If undead humans are freed like undead cockroaches, maybe they'd react quicker and nimbler than in life. Of course then again, that would mean hitting a zombie in the head wouldn't kill them.Personally I am not willing to sacrifice the gory necessity of obliterating a zombie's head, just to give a justification for added speed.To an earlier question, I'm not sure if I have a favorite zombie scene, but my favorite zombie movie remains Night of the Living Dead. For some reason the choices the people were faced with seemed realistic and fresh, and it was fun to see them go through the learning curve. I also think the black and white made the zombies seem more grisly... or maybe less fake?

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holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

Of course why limit ourselves to democrats? Someone can correct me if I am wrong but isn't Cheney undead?The way he speaks in slow rumbling monotones is more than reminiscent of the undead, as well as his slow stooped figure. The fact that he is usually stored in secure, hidden locations for "his safety" may also be an indication.If you notice you will rarely see him eating in public. In fact, when presented with a delicious cake before the press core he adamantly refused to eat it, hissing "brainssss" before security whisked him away.When a man acts like that, and routinely has to have his heart restarted... undead.Still not sure what ashcroft is, though liches come to mind.While Kerry certainly resembles the undead, specifically a reanimated Andrew Jackson, I kind of viewed Gore like an Ent from Lord of the Rings. Alive but very slooooooooowwwwwww.

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holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

I think they sped them up to add more tension to the film. Knowing that they could burst out of no where full speed would definitely add to the creep factor. The original Dawn of the Dead zombies were slow, stupid, and easy to kill. No major threat unless in great numbers. I like the new speedy zombies. Who says a zombie movie needs to be realistic...it's a movie about the undead eating the living...

ahh, but have you ever had a nightmare where you couldn't outrun the bad guy or where you seemed to be moving slow and couldn't escape from what you were running from. Slow moving zombies add to the nightmarish feeling of the movie, as well as to the suspense. No matter where you run you can't escape. My opinion is that the remake is a reflection of the fast pace of present society. Fast moving films with little substance and flashy graphics. The fast moving zombies are there because they allow the director to flash and cut through scenes.

Well i just went to go see the new Dawn of the Dead, and i think it was pretty frickin' good. I enjoyed the fast moving zombies(They didn't use it to cut through scenes fast either).Look for cameos by Tom Saviani and Ken Foree.Favorite zombie moment: Lawnmower scene in Dead Alive.