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Author Topic:   I wanna be a fossil
pesto
Member (Idle past 5587 days)
Posts: 63
From: Chicago, IL
Joined: 04-05-2006


Message 1 of 24 (307014)
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


I've been contemplating what I want done with my body when I die. I've decided, ignoring cost, I would like to become a fossil. I mean, how cool would it be to be dug up ten million years from now and end up in a museum. I wouldn't be around to see it, but it would still be amazing.
If I were to try to become a fossil, what would be the best way of going about it? Where should I be buried? At sea? In a lake?
I'm sure there are a lot of factors that I wouldn't have the slightest clue about.

Replies to this message:
 Message 2 by BMG, posted 04-27-2006 12:18 PM pesto has replied
 Message 5 by crashfrog, posted 04-27-2006 12:43 PM pesto has replied
 Message 9 by RickJB, posted 04-27-2006 2:51 PM pesto has not replied
 Message 14 by Omnivorous, posted 04-27-2006 4:13 PM pesto has not replied
 Message 15 by NeuroCycle, posted 04-27-2006 4:51 PM pesto has replied
 Message 17 by mark24, posted 04-27-2006 6:39 PM pesto has not replied
 Message 20 by Gary, posted 04-27-2006 8:46 PM pesto has not replied

  
BMG
Member (Idle past 208 days)
Posts: 357
From: Southwestern U.S.
Joined: 03-16-2006


Message 2 of 24 (307038)
04-27-2006 12:18 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by pesto
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


Hello
Hi Pesto.
I have to say that I couldn't help but smile when I read your post.
Pesto writes:
I mean, how cool would it be to be dug up ten million years from now and end up in a museum(?)
Interesting thought. But who's to say that humans will survive ten million years from now?
Pesto writes:
If I were to try to become a fossil, what would be the best way of going about it?
I recall learning that to increase your chances of passing and becoming a fossil, dying near a volcano or a river bank would increase your chances. Unfortunately, I can't remember the reasons why this is so.
I am assuming the river bank is suggested because rivers carry a great deal of sediment. This sediment would bury you, protecting your skeleton from erosion, I think.
I forget why volcanoes would be a prime place. Could be the expulsion of lava that would bury you, again under a great deal of matter, protecting you from erosion. But wouldn't the extreme heat melt you where you stood? I suppose you die, are slowly buried under sediment, and then the lava pours over you.
It might also have to do with the abundant presence of, I think, argon. But again, not sure. Someone that could help you with your endeavor is roxrkool: a geologist.
Sorry for the garrulousness of my post; brevity is not a virtue I possess, no matter how hard I try.
Welcome to EvC.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 11:12 AM pesto has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 3 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 12:32 PM BMG has replied
 Message 6 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 1:16 PM BMG has not replied

  
Parasomnium
Member
Posts: 2224
Joined: 07-15-2003


Message 3 of 24 (307042)
04-27-2006 12:32 PM
Reply to: Message 2 by BMG
04-27-2006 12:18 PM


Re: Hello
Infixion writes:
Pesto writes:
I mean, how cool would it be to be dug up ten million years from now and end up in a museum(?)
Interesting thought. But who's to say that humans will survive ten million years from now?
And who's to say it'll be humans who dig up Pesto?
Welcome to EvC to you too.

"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science." - Charles Darwin.
Did you know that most of the time your computer is doing nothing? What if you could make it do something really useful? Like helping scientists understand diseases? Your computer could even be instrumental in finding a cure for HIV/AIDS. Wouldn't that be something? If you agree, then join World Community Grid now and download a simple, free tool that lets you and your computer do your share in helping humanity. After all, you are part of it, so why not take part in it?

This message is a reply to:
 Message 2 by BMG, posted 04-27-2006 12:18 PM BMG has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 4 by BMG, posted 04-27-2006 12:40 PM Parasomnium has not replied

  
BMG
Member (Idle past 208 days)
Posts: 357
From: Southwestern U.S.
Joined: 03-16-2006


Message 4 of 24 (307044)
04-27-2006 12:40 PM
Reply to: Message 3 by Parasomnium
04-27-2006 12:32 PM


Re: Hello
Ah, touche. And thank you.

This message is a reply to:
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crashfrog
Member (Idle past 1466 days)
Posts: 19762
From: Silver Spring, MD
Joined: 03-20-2003


Message 5 of 24 (307047)
04-27-2006 12:43 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by pesto
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


If I were to try to become a fossil, what would be the best way of going about it? Where should I be buried? At sea? In a lake?
Basically your body needs to be protected from microbial decomposition and the chemical digestion of your own body enzymes. Microbes and enzymes, luckily for you, require largely the same kind of chemical environment, so it's fairly easy to defeat both of them at once.
I'm just thinking back to conditions under which we've recovered bodies many, many centuries after death:
1) Mummification by dehydration - an extremely hygroscopic environment will dehydrate your tissues. Absent water, enzymes can't break down your body and microbes can't survive. This is typically how we find mummified remains in desert environments. The Egyptians took advantage of that by packing the decedant with hygroscopic chemicals and removing water-dense tissues, such as the brain.
2) Mummification by cold - cold temperatures both retard or prevent microbial colonization and retard chemical processes. For instance, this is how we found the Copper Age "Ice Man". I wouldn't reccommend cryogenics - the staying power just isn't there - but theoretically you could work with glaciologists to find a cold place where you could be buried, someplace that's going to remain undisturbed for a very long time.
3) Fossilization in anaerobic environments - this is typically where most of the ossified fossils come from. This process is exceedingly rare, and because chemical decomposition is not retarded, generally little survives but the skeleton. There are still some environments today where you could expect to remain undisturbed, like tar pits, but it's a one in a million shot, I'd say.
Honestly I'd say your best bet is to be dehydrated and hermetically sealed into some kind of tube, then buried somewhere dry, out West maybe. If you really want to be an archeologic find, bury yourself with a couple of newspapers and a few electronic devices. Maybe the Encyclopedia Brittannica on DVD or something. And don't tell anyone your location - your more likely to survive the ages if no one knows where you are.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 11:12 AM pesto has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 7 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 1:22 PM crashfrog has not replied

  
pesto
Member (Idle past 5587 days)
Posts: 63
From: Chicago, IL
Joined: 04-05-2006


Message 6 of 24 (307063)
04-27-2006 1:16 PM
Reply to: Message 2 by BMG
04-27-2006 12:18 PM


Re: Hello
I would think a volcano would help if it were the kind that expels ash, not lava. Something like Mt. Saint Helen's as opposed to Hawaii. It's a good suggestion, but volcano eruptions are just to hard to predict. I don't think I could count on a suitable eruption happening near the time of my death.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 2 by BMG, posted 04-27-2006 12:18 PM BMG has not replied

  
pesto
Member (Idle past 5587 days)
Posts: 63
From: Chicago, IL
Joined: 04-05-2006


Message 7 of 24 (307065)
04-27-2006 1:22 PM
Reply to: Message 5 by crashfrog
04-27-2006 12:43 PM


I don't know that I'm a fan of using a tube. That seems more like preservation than fossilization. Call me a hopeless romantic, but I would want to rely more on natural processes. Although, I'm not against using some sort of preparation to help nature along.
Maily I was only expecting fossilization of my skeleton (i.e. ossification), and I realize that even the chances of that are slim, but what's my alternative? Basically rotting, like I would anyway. Nothing to lose.
This message has been edited by pesto, 04-27-2006 01:23 PM

This message is a reply to:
 Message 5 by crashfrog, posted 04-27-2006 12:43 PM crashfrog has not replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 8 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 2:33 PM pesto has replied

  
Parasomnium
Member
Posts: 2224
Joined: 07-15-2003


Message 8 of 24 (307093)
04-27-2006 2:33 PM
Reply to: Message 7 by pesto
04-27-2006 1:22 PM


A quick method
Here's a quick method: do something very unholy, something sure to incur the wrath of God. Then make sure to drown in the ensuing flood - forgoing the generous offer of a forty day cruise on an Ark - and get buried under a layer of sediment.
With any luck you'll be found in a mere six thousand years, and yet be dated to be a ten million year-old fossil, by those dumb scientists with their faulty dating methods. And then you'll go on to be the talk of the town not only among scientists, but among creationists as well.
What more could you wish for?

"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science." - Charles Darwin.
Did you know that most of the time your computer is doing nothing? What if you could make it do something really useful? Like helping scientists understand diseases? Your computer could even be instrumental in finding a cure for HIV/AIDS. Wouldn't that be something? If you agree, then join World Community Grid now and download a simple, free tool that lets you and your computer do your share in helping humanity. After all, you are part of it, so why not take part in it?

This message is a reply to:
 Message 7 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 1:22 PM pesto has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 10 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 3:10 PM Parasomnium has replied

  
RickJB
Member (Idle past 4990 days)
Posts: 917
From: London, UK
Joined: 04-14-2006


Message 9 of 24 (307103)
04-27-2006 2:51 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by pesto
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


Best. Thread. Title. Ever.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 11:12 AM pesto has not replied

  
pesto
Member (Idle past 5587 days)
Posts: 63
From: Chicago, IL
Joined: 04-05-2006


Message 10 of 24 (307117)
04-27-2006 3:10 PM
Reply to: Message 8 by Parasomnium
04-27-2006 2:33 PM


Re: A quick method
What more could you wish for?
The woman in your avatar as a girlfriend before I die.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 2:33 PM Parasomnium has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 11 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 3:17 PM pesto has replied

  
Parasomnium
Member
Posts: 2224
Joined: 07-15-2003


Message 11 of 24 (307122)
04-27-2006 3:17 PM
Reply to: Message 10 by pesto
04-27-2006 3:10 PM


Re: A quick method
What more could you wish for?
The woman in your avatar as a girlfriend before I die.
Do you know who she is? (If you click on the avatar, you'll see an enlarged version.)

This message is a reply to:
 Message 10 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 3:10 PM pesto has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 12 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 3:48 PM Parasomnium has replied

  
pesto
Member (Idle past 5587 days)
Posts: 63
From: Chicago, IL
Joined: 04-05-2006


Message 12 of 24 (307132)
04-27-2006 3:48 PM
Reply to: Message 11 by Parasomnium
04-27-2006 3:17 PM


Re: A quick method
Assimilate me!!!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 11 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 3:17 PM Parasomnium has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 13 by Parasomnium, posted 04-27-2006 3:56 PM pesto has not replied

  
Parasomnium
Member
Posts: 2224
Joined: 07-15-2003


Message 13 of 24 (307137)
04-27-2006 3:56 PM
Reply to: Message 12 by pesto
04-27-2006 3:48 PM


Stunning
Assimilate me!!!
I'll go one better, I'll stun you:

This message is a reply to:
 Message 12 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 3:48 PM pesto has not replied

  
Omnivorous
Member
Posts: 3977
From: Adirondackia
Joined: 07-21-2005
Member Rating: 7.3


Message 14 of 24 (307146)
04-27-2006 4:13 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by pesto
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


The L.A. Way
Tar pits are good.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 11:12 AM pesto has not replied

  
NeuroCycle
Inactive Member


Message 15 of 24 (307152)
04-27-2006 4:51 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by pesto
04-27-2006 11:12 AM


Space?
You could also figure out a way to dispose of your body in Earth's or even the moon's orbit. I would think it would have good preservation properties or am I totally of base with my rational?
Not really a traditional fossilization process and defiantly kill the "romance" of it

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 11:12 AM pesto has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 16 by pesto, posted 04-27-2006 5:25 PM NeuroCycle has not replied

  
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