Creationist Quotes wanted.

I never used to read much on the evolution/ cretinism debate, I really had no reason to as I know that the creation accounts in Genesis are myths, but I have found myself a bit more interested since I became a member here.I was reading the Zindler/Gish debate when I came across this little gem of a quote from Duane Gish I was in stitches!!Does anyone have any amusing creationist quotes?I am preparing to upload my website again, and I think I will devote a section to these pearls of wisdom.Brian.------------------
Remembering events that never happened is a dangerous thing!

More here...http://home.houston.rr.com/bybayouu/quotes.htmlThough most of them seem to be giving the out of context quoters a taste of their own medicine it also has this gem from our very own Fred Williams...

My apologies that this is a small section of a debate rather than a single quote, but this cracked up my whole science class (8th through 11th graders). It's from the Zindler Morris debate on the radio:Morris: Will you tell me where it says Noah had to take fish on board?Zindler: I'm saying it was an error because they didn't know he had to take fish on board.Morris: What you're saying is that the Bible account is wrong.Zindler: Yes!(skip about two sentences here, for brevity's sake)Morris: Nowhere is it claimed that they had to be on board.Zindler: That's why it's wrong! ...Morris: See what this is? This is atheistic logic here...radio show host: Well, he doesn't deny that!Morris: No, he doesn't. He's Madalyn Murray's right hand man!In the end Morris never addresses the point Zindler made clearly, that whales and fish could not have survived Noah's flood, and so they would have to be on the ark. I'm not sure Morris was ever even able to understand the point.

I have to thank Mr. Pamboli for pointing to this one (if I remember correctly)
http://members.truepath.com/vitaC/question.htmlNote this:

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Question 1: Why do I need vitamin C?

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Answer: Before creation began, God designed flesh to be about 90% water, surrounded by a skin. Our bodies are really a water bag internally supported by bones and muscles. Within the genetic code now known as DNA, God supplied four special genes to manufacture water soluble vitamin C in every creature on Earth. But man sinned in the Garden of Eden, and God punished man with a curse. The effect of the curse wiped out one of man's four special genes. This ruined status continues today. Every flesh creature on Earth except man and seven others still has the four special genes; man does not. As a result, man cannot manufacture his own vitamin C like all the animals. This biological deformity is responsible for thousands of ailments, sickness, and great suffering. Ezekiel's Medicine offers clear scriptural references, medical doctor quotations, and also identifies the forces and powers of this world determined to steal Christians' nutritional birthrights.

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Note the bold sentence. What has carefully been left out?

Ooh! Ooh! Pick me! Pick me! I know this one!Maybe they didn't feel like explaining why some other species of apes were cursed by God too. After all, how can animals sin?

Bingo!My question is: Are there in fact 7? Which ones?Chimp, Bonobo, Gorilla, Orangutan, Gibbon, I've run out of guesses?

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Maybe they didn't feel like explaining why some other species of apes were cursed by God too. After all, how can animals sin?

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Ah zephyr. When you're an old man like me, you will sadly begin to realize that creationism is beyond parody, as this page on "Fallen Man, Fallen Apes" makes clear ..."Humans have always been humans, and apes have always been apes - though when God made them they were both more complex than we see today. There is nothing in between the two groups. There are only fossil remains of the apes of Eden (perfect), and of their subsequent fall (degeneration) into the apes of today (imperfect)" ...To see the original page you'll need to google for "fallen man fallen apes" then look at the page in the Google cache.

Guinea pigs have a (differently scrambled) GLO pseudogene. I don't know another.

Add macaques to the list of vitamin C dependent primates. And IIRC Borger previously cited a number of bats which have defective GLO genes. I'm willing to place a small wager that the mutations in the bat GLO pseudogenes will be different to the SNP deletion common to humans, chimpanzees, macaques and orangutans. And I expect the guinea pig GLO pseudogene to be different again.This is the sort of information which Booboo and his creationist ilk studiously avoid because it is so damaging to their theological based arguments against evolution.

But maybe that site is right about the number 7 at least?

Back to the topic. Here's one of my recent favourites, from Terry on the msn "talkorigins" community. I quote it in full so you can savour it ...

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From Science News Online, located here:
http://www.sciencenews.org/sn_arc97/10_18_97/fob1.htm
comes this gem of wisdom:
Scientists have long viewed an upright, two-legged stride as a trait unique to hominids, the approximately 6-million-year-old human evolutionary family. However, it's time to give that assumption its walking papers, contend two anthropologists.
So 'scientists' thought an upright two-legged stride was unique to hominids, eh?

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I have seen a great variety of animals walk upright with a two legged stride. Most varieties of Bear. Almost all birds - some more than others. Even chipmunks, squirrels, groundhogs, some lizzards, and occasionally a dog, can walk upright with a two legged stride. Didn't t-rex walk this way also?

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Yes indeed. It is time to give that assumption its walking paper

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Our own moose and a couple of others tackled him on this and Terry eventually conceded. Nevertheless, this one post, I think sums up Terry's thought processes in a nutcase.

Do you have a link? I don't post on Terry's board but I do occasionally read posts over there when they get linked to, here. He strikes me as kind of arrogant, so I'd like to see him conceding something.I imagine your objections to his post was the fact that walking "upright" means walking with one's spine on top of one's pelvis, right? A posture that not too many animals are capable of - certainly not the ones Terry mentions.

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Our own moose and a couple of others tackled him on this and Terry eventually conceded. Nevertheless, this one post, I think sums up Terry's thought processes in a nutcase.

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That certainly seems to have been a typical wacky Terry topic. I, however, don't recall being involved in it, or even if the topic ever went anywhere. I just looked back through the list there, and didn't find the topic. Perhaps I just didn't recognize the title.By far, my main battle with Terry was over a "younger" Grand Canyon topic. I refer anyone who cares to the "Terry at the Talk Origins board" topic.Moose

Sorry folks, here is the link. I thought I had included it. A long url {edited to shorten display form, to restore page width to normal - D'oh Adminnemooseus}Moose, this obviously wasn't a memorable one for you! One of your exchanges struck me as particualrly classic Terry:

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Moose: Obviously, the topic of the page was comparing early man to early apes.
Terry: The page did not specify that at all; that is your interpretation of it only.

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Moose: Your thoughts on bears, birds, etc. are irrelevant to the discussion.
Terry: They match the discussion exactly; they are simply outside of the parameters which you have decided to place on it.
Moose: I see this topic as yet another of of your "nit pickings" on details of scientific investigation, in your ongoing efforts to run down the credibility of science.
Terry: I would not DREAM of running down science! I am, after, a lifelong scientist. What I AM doing is pointing out the magnitude of error which SOME scientists engage in.

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His concession is as follows:

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Although I maintain that the statement should have been better made, I concede this point to my esteemed opponents; the paper, in all likelihood, was not claiming that ONLY homonids (among all creatures) walked upright.

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Terry's board has however had one great boon - it put me back in touch with an old university friend. He found dealing with Terry as irritating as it was laughable.[This message has been edited by Adminnemooseus, 04-30-2003]

Guess what is the first post you link to in the "Terry at the Talk Origins Board" topic? You guessed it - the one about walking upright.When he returns, I expect Percy may have some comments on your impending senility.