What price political correctness?

Well, wait now. You just said no carry-ons. So where do these books and cards come from? As you've described it, airplane activities would be limited to:1) thumb-twiddling
2) uncomfortable sleep
3) masturbating in the restroom Most people won't want to, though. The measures you describe would spell the end of the airline travel industry.Also:

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and if you want to listen to the on plane music, it's cost five bucks to get the headset, 'cause your's most likely won't work unless you've got a hairband, gum, or rubber band).

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I just flew to and from Las Vegas last week, on some new Airbus jets, and not only did Frontier provide the headset for free, I discovered that my regular headphones worked just fine in the jack. (And also, weren't crap like the free headphones.) Ever since 747's stopped using those stethoscope "headphones" (where the speaker was actually located in the armrest and the headphones were just rubber tubes), I've never run into an armrest headset jack that wasn't the standard 1/8" miniplug.

Yeah, well, the 9 hours between Chicago and Amsterdam is always overnight when I've done it. Not much to look at there, but since it's usually mid-afternoon to your circadian rhythms, sleep is a challenge, too. (Plus it's better with the jetlag, I've found, to arrive at your destination exhausted and make it to local evening with caffiene.)

Is there honestly any magazine in print right now that it takes you 3 hours to read?Never seen a book on an airplane, except by accident. Unless the plane had it's own library - a massive waste of tonnage - there's no way that they could stock enough books to make it worthwhile. And what if it was a good book and you wanted to finish it?Never seen cards. Christ, who plays cards anymore except for gamblers and old farts? How are you supposed to play a card game when you're all sitting right next to each other? The guy in the middle can't keep his hand a secret from his buddies on either side.

Time spent sleeping off the daze doesn't count.