I often used to feel similar to what you've described. There's no straightforward answer but here's what helped me.
1. don't hang around in large groups. Personally, it makes me feel uncomfortable, as I don't like to keep butting in to an ongoing conversation. The simple rule to living a happy life is - if it makes you feel uncomfortable, don't do it. If I go out socially I like to talk to one or two people at once, not a big crowd. There's nothing wrong with that.
2. make friends with women. don't worry about fighting people with pitchforks - it's not a normal requirement in the society in which we live. more important than impressing women with physical prowess is making friends with women - and not trying to fuck them all the time.
3. keep being thoughtful and playful.
I'm serious when I say this. After many years of feeling socially uncomfortable, this is advice I can recommend personally. As a consequence of these guidelines, I've never slept with a person who I didn't know
very well. Some people might think this is not very adventurous, or not very macho, but it works for me. We're not counting notches on bedposts, after all.
Mick